


Like Stars

by o0SongAndSilence0o



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: BioWare, F/M, Garrus isn't getting involved, Plot Twist, Post mass effect 1, Proud Wrex, Pushingsian, Therapist Joker?, Tumblr Prompt, Whiskey makes it all better, fluffy goodness, post ME1, prompt, why do you make me feel things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-10 17:26:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8925883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/o0SongAndSilence0o/pseuds/o0SongAndSilence0o
Summary: After an explosive argument with Shepard, Kaidan finds relief at the bottom of a whiskey bottle and decides Joker is the best person to spill his relationship problems to... But drunk vision makes it difficult to see who exactly you're getting ahold of.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Pushingsian](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Pushingsian).



> Written for a two year old Tumblr prompt by Pushingsian. Not sure if someone ever wrote something for it, but I did! 
> 
> Prompt:
> 
> http://pushingsian.tumblr.com/post/98476174292/i-cant-write-to-save-my-life

“I don’t give a damn what brass says! Geth are not and were never the problem, Kaidan, and I will not waste any more of my time placating the Council!” The Commander all but screamed, the sound echoing in the cargo bay.   
Already, Garrus had found elsewhere to be, not wanting any part in the nuclear explosion that was Justis Shepard. True to himself as he was, Wrex stayed put just incase Kaidan needed rescuing. The idea of it made the Krogan chuckle, and he was inwardly proud of how intimidating the Commander could be.

 

And despite being used to her explosive outbursts, Kaidan couldn’t suppress a wince at the sharpness of her voice. “Shepard, like it or not, we still have to follow orders. I know that’s never been you cup of t-”

“Oh, you’re going to lecture me about following orders? I had to drag your ass off of Virmire, Lieutenant Alenko! Like it or not, I am still your commanding officer and the captain of this ship.” She snapped, now standing toe to toe with Alenko, daring him to keep pushing her any further.  
It was one of the few times she had ever used the card of superior rank against him, perhaps for the very reason she did it this time.   
The infrequency of it all but turned the Lieutenant to stone, dragging him back down to the reality that for all of their off duty personal interactions, he was still just another soldier under her boot.

 

Kaidan’s eyes glossed over, facial expression blanking as he forced himself to disconnect from what the verbal slap to the face did to him.   
“Yes, Commander. It won’t happen again, ma’am.” he spoke through tight lips.  
This, at least, succeeding in making Shepard back off. A muttered, ‘Damn right’ was said in parting, but as soon as her body turned away from him, Kaidan was already halfway to the elevator. 

 

Thoroughly furious and barely containing the shame of the argument, he held himself together long enough to retrieve the bottle of whiskey from his foot locker and lock himself in a storage closet.  
There was very little point in bothering with a glass, as Alenko fully intended to drink as much of the bottle as possible. 

 

It was perhaps an hour, give or take, later when the heaviness was lifted from him via the increasing intoxication. All the same, he remembered everything that had led him to this well enough.   
Joker would understand; he always did. Somehow, despite how insufferable or scathing Shepard could be, the pilot always took it in stride. To a hair’s-breadth from drunk Kaidan, that qualified the poor man to being the perfect choice in who to talk about this with. 

 

Standing proved a virtual impossibility, indicated by the stumbling and laughing accompanying the failed attempts. After a couple of these, and another sip or so from the bottle, Kaidan just slid back to the floor. What were communicators for if not for situations like this?

 

J...J...J...Aha, there it was, he read through blurry vision, selecting the cripple’s name from the list on his omnitool. It gave off a soft ping of confirmation when the connection was established and Kaidan wasted no time in launching into the drunken rant that he had no idea was so tightly pent up inside of himself. 

 

Initially, it began with venting about the argument in the shuttle bay. Gushing, in as much detail as his foggy mind could recall, about how unreasonable the Commander was, and that bending the rules could be done without entirely breaking them.  
Essentially, a good few points that should have been made much earlier. Making a mental note that he knew he would forget, Kaidan reminded himself to relay them to her later.  
It wouldn’t be the first time Shepard used the system to her advantage, so instead of being charged again with stealing the ship, maybe try using Geth as an excuse to go where she wants to? Just an idea.

 

But, as more whiskey led to having a much louder mouth with very few defined lines in the sand, poor Joker would have to suffer more personal details plaguing the Lieutenant.  
“And fighting with her...it’s making this worse and I just...I know it. She shuts down on me, Moreau, wheneb...winnev...every time I try bringing up us, you know?” 

 

There was a rustle from the other end of the comm that Kaidan ran with as encouragement to continue.   
“She either gets mad, not mad like earlier but mad like...like ice queen stares that make you want to go somewhere else, or jokes.” He groaned, needing a long swig from his good friend Jim. “‘Aww look, is Alenko getting sentimental?’ or ‘Us? But that would be against regulashuns and I’m a...good girl’” he mimicked in a higher pitched tone geared to imitate the Commander.

 

“She doesn’t...doesn’t see though. Doesn’t see how cute her dimples are, did you know she has them because..I didn’t at first. Not until I made her laugh. God, I love making Jus laugh.” A wistful sigh passed his honey tasting lips as he remembered that first time. He had made some comment about Udina being obnoxiously serious, and had managed to strike the right chord.   
He’d done everything to hear that sound as often as possible since then.

 

This led him even farther down a rabbit hole that likely he would be chastised or teased for later, but right then in that storage closet, he didn’t care.  
“She can be so sweet too, Joker. You don’t know, guess you do now but, this implant causes...bad migraines. You’re lucky you don’t have one, but you’ve got that bone thing I suppose...anyway, she kinda sings and I’ve never slept better than when Jus’ fingers are in my hair. That doesn’t sound weird, does it?”

 

He asked a question, of course, but that didn’t mean the drunken marine was going to wait for a response. He was on a roll, of sorts. Fleeting thoughts of how Joker must be dying to hang up or if anyone knew he was in the closet came and went in the moments where he shut up just long enough to take another drink.

 

“They look like...Aquarius.” Kaidan rushed out with what he intended to be a statement of deep meaning, entirely forgetting that half of the sentence wasn’t even spoken aloud.   
This brought a questioning ‘hmm?’ from the comm, bringing Kaidan to realize that the pilot had missed the point.  
“The freckles on her shoulder...they look like stars and I kiss them like you’d count the real ones. Everything about her is...Moreau I hope you look at someone like I look at Shepard.”

 

Alenko didn’t realize that he was slowly crying until he felt a drop land onto the hand holding the whiskey bottle. With a laugh that shook the Lieutenant like a leaf, he hoped his voice was loud enough to hear. “I think I love her, man.”

 

Another crackle of response, and Kaidan nearly began a closing apology, knowing he had said far too much this time when a gentle sigh breathed through the receiver.   
“Oh, Kaidan…” Justis’ silk-soft voice replied, realization almost sobering the man on the other end entirely. “I think I might love you too…” 

 

It seemed as though she was about to add something else, but then the ship-wide intercom activated and Joker broadcasted to the ship words that none of them knew would change literally everything.

 

“Brace for evasive maneuvers!”


End file.
